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To Blessings in Disguise 

31 March 2022

 

Hello hi. MAN, I’m a terrible blogger. Seriously. Terrible. But I’m here now so let’s not dwell.

 

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about moving on from Kisma Kreative. Crazy, I know! Who even AM I without Kisma? Kisma Kreative has been going for so long and is such a part of me, it is hard to separate the entity from my own personality. Maybe that is the point though. Maybe I’ve been using Kisma as a shield. Maybe I just need to separate it, split myself, so that I can ‘find myself’ to use a tired but valid cliché.

 

I am no longer the person I was when I started on Kisma. Who is?! It’s been 20 years since Amanda, and I worked on our first order of 300 mini Christmas crackers with a bottle on wine and a dictionary trying to find a name we could put on the invoice.

When I started on my Kisma journey it was all about how I would make it big one day. It was always about doing good but also getting paid for it. I worked hard, so hard. We didn’t have social media, people like me didn’t even feature on the internet yet. We had phone and fax. Email was brand new. I used phonebooks and business cards to find contact details for gift shops and craft shops. I faxed product lists and to these shops in the hopes that I could snag an order. That’s how I started out. I set up my website when I could afford it and when the internet opened up a bit, I listed Kisma Kreative on every free index and directory I could find. Upcycling became fashionable and I started being approached by corporate event organizers to design and make conference bags and gifts. Anyone who knew me back then will remember the great chip packet collection of 2008 when the order for upcycled purses kept getting increased while the deadline stayed the same. Crazy times.

 

I’ve run a shop Kisma @ Co where I sold my own work and the work of other local makers and creators. I’ve organized markets and pop-up shops. Some successful and some, not so much. I have met so many wonderful people, many of them have become my friends. Kisma has helped me find my tribe, especially in recent years. I am truly grateful for the community I have found though Kisma Kreative.

 

The last three years have been especially hard though. Actually, a little bit longer than that if I look back now, to when I was sick and tired and didn’t even know it. Because we just keep going, don’t we? We don’t want anyone to think we are lazy or weak. I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer in 2019 and then there were two years of wtf pandemic that tipped the whole world into turmoil. After all this I feel like I’m devolving. Or maybe evolving? For a while it was terrifying. It still is. A lot of ups and downs and the urgent feeling of needing to make decisions, because time is running out. I never know if/when the cancer might return and I won’t get off as lightly next time. I don’t want to waste time. I don’t want to waste time doing something just for money or just for the sake having something to tell people when they ask “And what do you do?”

 

Maybe it’s time to just be grateful for the position I am in. I can take it easy, take time to figure it out. Midlife crisis much?! That’s ok. It’s time for a rebrand – maybe even a debrand!

 

I’m going to take this new month, April and try to write a blog every week at least. Probably on a Thursday – it seems to be when my mind is in the best place for writing. As good as it gets anyway. I have always had a grasshopper brain and it’s hard to tie down. So, if you are interested in taking this journey with me keep popping in late on a Thursday or probably best to check on a Friday. I don’t know were I’m going with this, but it’s that half the fun? Let’s see where April takes us.

 

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